What helping a waiter clear the table says about your personality

A small action that reveals far more about you than you might think.

You may have seen it without paying much notice - or perhaps you do it yourself. In a restaurant or café, some customers help the waiter clear the table by gathering plates, cutlery and cups together. Far from being insignificant, this behaviour can reveal a great deal about your personality.

Quoted by Pure People, psychologist Francisco Tabernero believes that “offering to help the waiter selflessly demonstrates empathy” and represents “pure altruism”. It is therefore a prosocial act, carried out with no expectation of payment or immediate recognition.

Helping the waiter clear the table: a valued workplace quality

These are also qualities that are highly valued in the workplace, yet cannot be identified during a job interview or recruitment process. When you help clear the table without being asked, the waiter can complete the task much faster and more efficiently. The same kind of initiative can make a real difference in a professional setting.

More than an altruistic gesture

According to Lachlan Brown, a well-known expert in mindfulness, relationships and personal development, cited by Psychologies.com, the gesture also reflects humility. The person puts themselves on an equal footing with the waiter, showing that every contribution deserves respect and consideration.

Empathy, humility and a desire for approval

Finally, Francisco Tabernero says that this behaviour can be a form of passive self-assertion which “creates an excessive fear of other people’s negative judgement. This trait can be seen in people who are overly helpful, both towards those close to them and towards strangers.” Put simply, “it is sometimes no longer just an altruistic gesture, but rather a need to please and avoid being judged negatively. It is a need to be viewed favourably.”

We hope these observations give you something to consider. They could also spark a conversation with those close to you next time you are in a restaurant or café. Have you ever noticed this sort of behaviour when a waiter comes to clear the table? Tell us in the comments.